The Eight Stages of Intimacy
[To achieve a successful relationship]
[ This
is a long post so I am going to separate it into 8 different days or
sections which talk about the individual 8 stages of how a relationship
is created into intimacy (not sexual) (his wasn't written by me) and then link them all together]
[Italics is my writing -FYI]Is your relationship everything you ever hoped for? Does it feel like something is missing or maybe it’s just note quite what you are looking for? Do your romances crash and burn before six months?
The following illustrates the eight different stages of intimacy. With your life partner, achievement of at least seven of the eight leads to relationship success. With friends, coworkers and associates, you’ll match in some, but not all.
TO ACHIEVE TRUE INTIMACY, TWO IDEAS MUST BE PRESENT: SAFETY & CONNECTEDNESS
SAFETY means
that as the relationship grows between two people. Should something
frighten, upset or threaten you, your partner becomes the safe haven,
the person you seek rather than avoid. Safety is something a person
earns through trust and actions.CONNECTEDNESS or more commonly chemistry is that feeling that you are in tune with the other person; you have enough common ground to feel comfortable yet enough differences to keep things interesting. True intimacy cannot be achieved without feelings of safety and feelings of connectedness.
If you're just starting to date again, and are tired of unfulfilling relationships and short-term romances (less than six months), the eight stages will help you achieve a loving relationship by giving you a step by step guide to dating. Make a commitment to yourself to explore each stage in-depth with a potential mate before proceeding to the next. Most superficial relationships will fall apart during stages four through six, the very stages most people skip in order to experiment in seven. Then they wonder why the relationship didn't last! When you finish this article, you may be enlightened
[Stage 1 and/orvDay 1]
1. Physical Intimacy (Looks, etiquette, charisma)
Commonly referred to as infatuation or puppy love, physical intimacy occurs through information you acquire through observation, the way the person thinks, speaks, looks and interacts with their surroundings. Generally, if you are attracted to someone of the opposite sex, you share physical intimacy. You will also find most of your friends via physical intimacy, realizing that there is something about this person you like and you would like to get to know them better.
You & your partner have physically intimacy if you both can answer Yes to all of these situations:
1. You like something about the way your partner looks, sounds and/or smells.
2. You are proud to be seen together or enjoy being together.
3. When you think about your partner or see a picture of him/her, you think or feel positively.
[These are guidelines that I thought were very interesting, and I'm being quite frank since I'm new to the dating world because I had given up on love, I read these and thought they were good and they explain a lot of how and why we sometimes fail at creating a strong bond.
The first step just how all guys mention is the physical appearance of the opposite sex (which most guys talk about hot chicks), but there is more to the hotness you witness but it's by in large the biggest part. It's obvious that if there is no attraction to a person you can't continue onto the next steps. ]
2. Aesthetic Intimacy (Arts, style, Culture, General Compatibility)
3. Recreational Intimacy (Shared interests, sports & Hobbies)
4. Intellectual Intimacy (Hopes, fears, opinions, beliefs)
5. Spiritual Intimacy (Morality, Ethics, shared Existence, & Shared goals)
6. Emotional Intimacy (Feelings, Trust, Security, Safety)
7. Sexual Intimacy (Touching, sexual liberation, Physical contact, Romance, Copulation & procreation)
8. Unconditional Love (Love & Support without Strings, Expectations and Regrets)
The eight Stages of Intimacy by Laura Lewis
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