I have a scattered brain at times...
(Going to be all over the place)
Catholics /pro-life and women and the lack of support … actually I felt like they sort of turn their back on you, well that’s how I felt or like if you don’t belong quite at the same level as everybody else… You’re not married, you’re not single (you’re with kid), your sins are cleared as long as you’re chaste but you can’t be guidance to someone else (godparent) you’re not a good example… geez I don’t know I think I would be a better example… Don’t have kids!!!! (not a great example?)
Let me go back a little.
Sex can lead to kids if you do it wrong… Well not doing it wrong because you're actually doing it right but unprotected. There are so many kids having kids (or “babies having babies,” like my HS music director use to tell us) and they truly do not know what they’re getting themselves into. Instead of trying to forcefully claim the “abstinence” rule as adults we need to realize that you were young and you had raging hormones at one point and maybe thinking, -Hey, so “abstinence only” isn’t working, How about we teach them what safe sex is and maybe they’ll be more responsible or at least more knowledgeable. We don’t need the stupid rebuttal that if you teach them about sex they’re going to have sex…Guess what? Kids are already having sex… make them smarter about it…
There are many kids that still value their virginity which is great and they should find their special person and practice, practice, practice… Don’t believe in sex before marriage then don’t do it. Simple! But, it’s not that simple.
(But not always, it will make the moment special, just not your first time)
I know when it comes to religion you’re not supposed to do it… sex it bad or intimacy between a couple should be held sacred and what not and possibly only for reproduction. But, it’s more about the love the couple holds for each other than just reproduction. Your intimacy, whether it’s in various forms or sexual intimacy, it is very important for a couple have. Or what do I know …
Ok, but here is where Pro-life comes in… Do not have abortions. And you have all these young girls scared of their minds knowing they’re carrying a child and don’t know what to do. The church says keep the child; it’s the right thing to do. Well, firstly common sense now, is sex leads to a high possibility of getting pregnant. Now, if the church wanted to avoid young girls having that confusion teach something other than abstinence only, it’s ignorant in these times. And girls who are not using protection when they’re having sex are stupid. Even if you bf tell you he doesn’t feel anything because of the “condom,” I don’t know about him but not feeling something as much sure beats a crying baby every night and sleepless nights as a teenager. And, still having to go to school…
What do I know… yea I wasn’t pregnant in high school I can’t imagine how hard it is.
When I was young I never really heard anything about sex. I frankly didn’t know where kids came from, I was naïve and completely ignorant and stupid. All I remember being told was “Don’t let anybody touch your private parts” and later on I heard sex was shameful before marriage. I was 17 and had a bf who I loved dearly and it was too late. I did think he was going to be my one and only at one point, and that’s another thing we young girls don’t think about too much. Our high school sweetheart is rarely the one we will actually marry but it’s a sweet thought and fantasy. It gets to a point where teens don’t understand those definitions of sex (well maybe I didn’t back then which was still only 9 yrs ago when I was 17) or the church isn’t doing enough to provide education for kids to understand sex (which should be parents responsibility as well but since the church guides them too, they’re not going to talk about)… When you feel an urge you go with it. Especially young men, they get a stronger urge (not saying girls don’t) but that build a curiosity in girls. (Hence why I want boys only and no girls) and not to mention the emotional attachment that gets embedded into a girl, hormonal and (if religious) a religious responsibility to now want to keep this person for yourself forever.
I wasn’t in high school pregnant. I actually found out I was pregnant at the end of my sophomore year in college. I don’t know about you… Class material and responsibilities are much harder in college than in any high school. And I had my son mid semester of my junior year... you know perfect timing, a few days before finals.. Yay! And, 4weeks before my 21st.
I
had 4 weeks off after his birth and 2nd semester started so I went
right back to my University and had to fight over some classes and took
some over... Sometimes I went with child to take him to appointments.
I think it would have been easier in high school (certain things
would) but that’s not the point. You’re giving up your life and
potential messing the life up of a little innocent child. I don’t
believe in abortion, I felt I had made a choice and my choice came with
the responsibilities which obviously led to a child.
(Being pregnant so young isn't a game or fun, it's life changing in fact I think all kids.. boys and girls should take a health class that makes them handle a fake baby...it will annoy you i'm sure and it will be easier than the real baby)
In my situation: Here was the thing I was completely alone. I had no one to turn to and I felt alone. My parents didn't come into the picture (I was working 2 jobs over summer and didn't notice my pregnancy) until I told him a couple weeks before I was suppose to return to school. I had a plan in case they kicked me out. I was scared and 5 months pregnant. There is a lot of emotional support women need when they’re pregnant. And the need comes in various forms… young girls are not ready and it should be a mature and conscious choice, not a surprise.
In January, I called the church I attend because I had been asked to be the Godmother of a child. And I was asked when she has just found out she was pregnant. And I was turned down. They said that I couldn’t do it. I would be a witness but I was chosen to sponsor this baby and they asked if I was married and I said no. I told them I had a child. So they asked if lived with my son’s father and I said no… I told them I was a single mother with child… so the lady said that
Since I was not married and I was not single “single”, I had a child I couldn’t do it. It felt like a total slap in the face from the church. If felt like they were giving me a statement… -well it’s not ok for an abortion but if you had one, we wouldn’t know therefore we couldn’t restrict you from holding special roles- instead of saying well you’re a member of our community and we’re pro-life, we know you’re a single mom and we would give you special classes to show you what it takes to hold this responsibility for this child that will need you in the future as guidance.
But, since you went through with having a child, we know you have a child and good for you but you’re no good in our books, you sinner…you have a child and you’re not married… therefore you’re not worthy… That’s exactly how I felt.
Well, I'm against abortion but I don't think it's completely about all abortion, for me personally I rather people be responsible and use safe sex than use abortion as a type of birth control. Don’t get me wrong I will never want the government to try and take away the choice from women but Women need to be more responsible about sex. I wouldn't have an abortion myself.
The issue that comes with pro-life is that they are for all the rights for the fetus, the little baby in the womb which is great. But, what happens to us single mothers after the babies are born. We have not where to turn. That is no longer an issue for them. They just advocate for children being born. A program should definitely be in place for so many single mothers to help them cope through the issues. There are so many things you go through and suddenly you feel every door has been closed and slammed in your face. It’s not fair especially for very young women…
This is why safe sex is important in so many levels.
Let the light bulb turn on....
If you don't want to get pregnant and your bf doesn't want a child and neither do you and he refuses to be safe ...
Be SMART!!!!
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