Yeah, well there has to be an excuse... I am sure there probably is and he probably... wait no I am sure he didn't show. People and their wanting chances and shit but when you give it to them... they do what? Fuck up, that's what. He wanted to skype the night before I ended up being too tired after Danny finally fell asleep like almost midnight. I usually don't have time until after danny is knocked out. And he didn't respond until 4 which means he probably went into work at 6... I don't know... during the day he said that we weren't going to meet for the music thing instead he wanted to meet, talk and plan... ok... He asked if I would wait which annoyed already I said yes. I had a lesson that day which was over by 1pm... do you know how much time I had to kill... fucking shit! So I manage to hang out with a friend (which is another story) and we just talked for a while...I went to go do some errands and took my sweet time doing them too...like an hour or a lil more... and then I headed to the starbucks... I manage I can kill time there... use the internet and what not and just wait until 7 when we're suppose to meet. I got there at 6 and sent him a message at which one I was going to be... I don't know where he lives but I know the vicinity and very close...He put ok... I sent him a message an hour before and I think if I'm not being generous that it's enough time to tell me you're running fucking late, seriously. So I was in starbucks and it was so freaking cold... i was shivering but stayed there and wasted time. So it was 7:47 and I decided he was a no show...I can't wait for some stupid guy when I have shit to do at home and worse that it takes me an hour or so there... As I was in the car he sends me a message asking where I was ... So I put heading home... so he put "dam ok" like I'm going to sit around and wait. I actually wanted to leave before that but I was hoping... hoping in vain... He said he had just gotten out... of what, work? Probably not... he probably went to a buddy's house and time just flew off his hands... And he said he would make up to me... How is he suppose to make it up to me if he didn't even have the courtesy to inform me form the beginning...Even if he send me a message at 7saying hey I am running late... I wont be able to make it... at least I would have thought... I knew this was going to happen... which I did but I didn't think he wouldn't say anything until I was leaving... I had a gut feeling he was not going to show but I was hoping he was...
The ride home I was mad... I was ... so upset I had to get a fucking cig to relax... you know how long it's been since i've needed a cig.... months and mostly I've given them away... I've smoked like 3 since like march... and those were like 2 then... 1 me and another we all shared... I had to smoke to relax or I would have been even more so furious... I guess what I couldn't find a lighter...fucking pissed.... So I stopped in some gas station on my way up on highway 138-palmdale just to get a light... it started doing it's job but wasn't enough this time... I guess I was really upset... So upset that when i got home I had an upset stomach... I wanted to throw up... I guess I must have thrown a small tantrum in my body for it to upset itself too.
So I was half asleep well almost all asleep and he sends me a message if I wanted to skype... I was too tired... I guess he understood... but wasn't probably happy that I didn't want to talk to him yet. He doesn't understand how freaking valuable time is and for me to find things to do to buy myself time to wait for him at 7 is really big fucking deal... I guess some just don't understand that... What would they do if it was their fucking time... would they wait around like some bitches do... I guess sometimes we're the stupid ones... we allow ourselves or lower ourselves and for what?
And people tell me, you're find a nice guy... ppsh... yea... where under a fucking rock? I either get some form of a player or... some stupid bitches think I'm with their man... Bitch no... I don't want you're sloppy seconds... They aren't even up to a level where I would even consider... you keep your trash and I'll keep digging for mine. Simple as that!
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