Funny and awkward at times how things happen but you actually want them to happen it all falls apart... Iff it all would have worked but it was playing in the past it must just have been fine and dandy.
Ok, so there is the guy that I have like for quite some time who is probably oblivious to it or just prefers being friends, idk. I try but not hard enough to make it awkward or so obvious but I know how it can get for people to get over things.Maybe sometimes friends are just friends no matter what... What ever! My mom when I was little always told me it's better when you go for a guy who likes you more than you like him. She says that if we like them more at the beginning more than often we'll end up hurt... But don't know if those rules apply to life nowadays. Besides maybe when a girl innitiates a convo or something eventually they have a right or a choice to reciprocate the feelings or not. I mean we don't wait for ever...
Now, B is really sweet. He is. I guess he is thee guy that might actually try... who knows but who ultimately can have a fight in all of this. I enjoy talking to him. He was always known to be one of those jock kind of guys... or sort of player type but I don't know the way he talks to me is different. And I guess I can't start talking to people think of who they were until I know who they have become. We all change in the years...And even though it's been a good 2 1/2 years since we last really talked... we'll see... Things are never complicated we just try and make them that way.
Alright and to the high light of the day. Like about almost a year I was I was sort of talking to this guy... not as in talking but you know... he has or had this fantasy that we would have a fling or I don't know. The funny and weird thing is that they find me weirdness the most appealing... idk. Every single guy in my life has said that that was one of the features that attracted them to me...Anyways, It was just going to be a sexual fantasy or whatever that he thought would be something interesting... and well I agreed sure why not. He was the most straight forward about the whole situation and was never embarrassed to talk about anything. He said back them that he would be the in between guy until we both or one found someone... yeah... but unfortunately or fortunately... I don't know. We were finally suppose to meet oh so many months back but it never happened. And he change his whole profile and deleted everybody... I was okay with it... I don't care...so today I saw that an old friend had added him or rather that he accepted her request. So i decided to send him a message remembering of how his business had been blossoming and a congratulations... you know ...a random hi. And I was quite amazed he was actually online or maybe like me he received his messages on his phone. But he said things are good and ask how I was... sent me his new number and told me to text today! and then proceeded to ask me what I was doing later. Told him I was good but that I was heading home from F city to AV since i'd moved and he asked if I moved alone. So I explained a lil which he probably didn't care anyways...He was more interested in knowing if I was going to be there around 7-9 which was when he supposedly got out of work. Told him no... I had been in town since morning.... and guess what he told me... "well i think you should consider coming down tomorrow late" hahaha.... ooohhh so sexy to be told what to do... by some kid 4 years younger... lol... but still appealing though in a weird way. I mean there is no x factor there is only that... a hook up ok... leave right... well at least that is what I think I understand. So I told him that I wasn't going to be around until wednesday which I will be done late... and he says... "hmm wednesday! geez so far from now. but i suppose" .... yea I suppose... his answer was to be like if I sent him a message so he would have sex with me or something... "I suppose" ...lol! People are weird and I guess I appeal to weird people because I am weird?
Do I really have some sign that says... Oh please! I haven't had sex in ages... fuck me now! ... and that is for some few or a sign saying... oh yeah I don't like dating... please Fuck off!...
Do I really?
I don't know what's going to happen next week....
But at this point I am really not surprised at anything... I use to send this guy texts way back when... but this time I'll let him come to me... it's only right! I like the pursuit but I enjoy doing it too...
Never in my right mind would I have thought that a simple... hey how are ya doing ... would amount to hey... tonight... and he never said it but it was implied.... so surprised he didn't ask me for pictures... but I guess that will be Wednesday... lol...
Well so many things can change up to that day... besides I can do what ever the fuck I want... Not committed to any one, not any one's lady or gf... what ever... only time will tell...
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