a search for happiness is within...

I find it funny how sometimes we search every where for things but they are just right under our noses. So today I went to the store to buy something because I forgot it at home and needed it. Well I literally looked in every single isle but nothing. I was about to go to the front of the store to ask the clerk for some help until I see it. It was in the front of the store. They purposely put it towards the front so people don't have to search and here I go looking every where but there it was.

Sometimes it is those kinds of lessons that bring us to meditate a little about us and our lives. I read some quote a little  corny but anyways, " Happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things it will come and sit softly on you shoulder..."

I know it's corny but it's a perfect example of when we search and search and search to catch something and end up empty handed. I, for many years, thought that if I had a boyfriend or someone to keep my mind off things I would be happy. I Pretended to be happy for a while but we all knew the truth. It becomes hard when something you pretend for so long to be isn't because at the end you're lying to yourself and it becomes and endless circle of turmoil.  I chased happiness pretending to be someone I wasn't or some one I was but was not accepted for. There are so many ways, so many wrong ways we sometimes search for happiness or whatever it is and it doesn't come about. Everything comes in it's own time. We just have to be patient enough to realize that we can't have it all even though we want it now. We have all heard the endless struggle or search for the "chalice" or "holy grail" well all the barriers we put our selves through is just that search... our search for oour own "holy grail"; the one thing that makes us happy and who we are be in peace. The biggest search is not to find happiness although many confuse the happiness with actually finding out who they are and how they fit into this crazy world. With every single person having so many things in their minds, it is hard for others to have the time to care if somebody else is depress; they have enough on their plate to have to worry about another begin as well. And that is when some feel lonely, or even feel as though they are not understood because they feel abandoned. But, we are so selfish ourselves that so not think or well if I'm depress well if a friend isn't coming to my aide because he/she might be depressed or need my help... we only think of the loneliness we feel and how we have failed. Well if we were there more for our friends then we wouldn't be as lonely; we would at least start understanding what we are all going through. The search to be found withint ourselves and the society we want (our friends).,