Well I feel a lot better. I figured that I might as well look for my self now and not depend on others for the hope that I am not guaranteed. I have made myself happy and why ruin that by any little thing in my life. There is more to happiness than to loose those around you. Sure at one point they can make you happy but in many occasions they are also the ones who break you. And no I am not going to allow people break me that easily anymore.... I have learned a lot seeing my self through your eyes... there are many things that I know I can't forgive myself. Sadly, I have said that there are no regrets but unlike many people I do some regrets and although I know I can't change them and my life consists of many what ifs my life is just that, my life. I don't torture my self thinking of things that use to break me but rather just don't let them get to me. Although, I am going to deny that I don't like chick flick but I do and you know why? Just for the fact that I love to cry every once in a while and no I am not ashamed to admit it but I hate people seeing me cry. I do admit that all my friends have seen me cry in my most vulnerable times but that was it, it was one of the times I my immunity was gone and couldn't help it. But now, it's all about how I can be my self but just enough for you to know that I am me, and nothing else. Sure I can explain my personality and how I feel and way I was brought up but that can be for another day. I know that I am always looked at in many different eyes and I can't change. I learned that whether I am who I am or who I am pretend to be people will look at me that same and there is nothing I can do about it... oh well... but let's just say I am happy...