Things are good and bad as always... things are very tough economically and even though we are like 4 months behind we finally manage to pay 1 1/2 worth of it... food is very little I think we're surviving so we're not starving. Things are very tough but at least my dad is working. We finally got my white car back so thankfully my dad is coming back to sleep at home more often than he was before. For a while we thought he just didn't want to come back but he is coming back so I think he appreciated what it is to be with us.
Christmas well in our household for years it has mainly been just a regular day but it was a good day. We didn't do anything for Christmas Eve well we never do but this year since my brother's gf was coming over we made some dinner... something fast and my sister came over that night too... We ate and then watched a movie... and then sleep... Christmas day we all woke up really late and my dad didn't want to go to church with my mom so she asked me... my sis and I both went with her.Then we came back and made food. My sister has bought something for Danny for Christmas so she had him open the gift... Since for his birthday she got him a Buzz Light Year, for Christmas he got a Woody ... he was very excited and she got him a little shirt and her friend bought Danny a pair of shoes... We are very grateful for all of them. Then in the evening her bf came over and he brought Danny a lil gift which ended up being "How to train your Dragon" and Danny hasn't stopped watching it since then.... People who love Danny!
Unfortunately, for the rest of us we couldn't buy anything but that's what made me realize so much more the meaning of Christmas and how family is so important. See when we were little and like many kids you get an idea -a false idea- of Christmas which is receiving gifts and sure very year we would look forward to it but that wasn't but it really was about. I know this was the first year in my life where I just couldn't afford anything for him which I felt bad. But, at the same time he's not asking for Christmas gifts bc it's nothing something we have embedded into his little mind. We have had tough years for sometime now and my bros still complain a bit but there is so much they don't understand... which is where money comes from... Jobs are still tough... but we're all trying our best to make ends meet. Sometimes some take for granted what we have....they complain about the food and that we don't have TV... and our services being shut off all the time but we're struggling and trying our best.
I hope things change soon. Well I know things will change. And it's always for a positive. One brother has his baby due in like a week... he's the one that will have to do the more growing up and changes bc he's just too selfish still and doesn't understand. The comments he makes are so frustrating... But we are all in a path and we have a place and a mission to accomplish.
The New Year is right around the corner.There is so much to give thanks for. There are so many people that have came in and left... so many have impacted in ways they will never know... but that's what I am thankful for. I think that even though 2010 has been the poorest year, it has truly been the year that we have been given many gifts particularly myself. I have learned to open and close myself... I have learned more about my heart and people... and what makes me happy and how to control my sadness. I have learned to actually want a pregnancy once again then yet again not want one.
This year like every year has been for like 5-6 years... if it all goes as planned I will be going to my friends to end this old year and welcome the New Year! I know we should do it in family but it's not a constant thing with the family and it's been a small tradition established where we all go see each other and enjoy... it will be all just like in Vegas in September and the Wedding in October... the same friends always together making memories... the best of friends.... and even though we rarely see each other the moments we do they're memorable. :) Which reminds me the Wedding premier for the October one we were in will be on January 9th, 2011 ! 9pm in WeTV which means there will be posting of pics shortly after. I can't believe the time has finally came. Time flies...
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