Dream

Well the last couple of nights have been full of dreams especially this night. They have consisted of Tony which I am yet to understand because we haven't had that much communication. Or better yet there is now less interaction. I had a lot of dreams last night and remember bits and pieces but very blurry. There was a lot of action as in movement but there is one that stands out the most and I don't know why but it woke me up with my heart racing...

So I was in like this lil cart, it seemed Like I was getting on a ride or something . I remember looking down at it and thinking man why do My hips have to be so big... So I kept trying to scoot over to my right and kept moving over but of course there is only so much right you can move... And when I was in the process doing that Tony comes and sits right next to me. Good thing he's really skinny or wouldn't have fit. He sits and puts his arm around me. I was so confused and he says "let me tell you something" and my heart starts racing, his arms around my shoulder and turning me as he's looking straight into my eyes "you're different, they're all the same. They're too normal" 
"even ......" referring to his now b and he nods ... He was about to say something and I freak out ... And that's where I wake up ... I couldn't sleep and I couldn't hear what he had to say ... It was too much for me to handle even in a dream. 

It was weird I've never had a dream where I felt it was too intense and I couldn't take hearing what they had to say. Good thing it was a dream and not real... I guess easier to run in a dream than if we were face to face...
I guess since it was also a dream I just preferred not giving me a false illusion at something that's not... I mean its obvious. I try really hard not to think of him like that but only as friends ... And when this happens it helps doubt whether I'm actually over him or if he were to kiss me I would still melt. His kisses have been one of the only ones that struck me and I felt something. *sigh* yea good thing I didn't hear the last part...