It's funny how the stress of having the lack of money still appears. Even though a long time I ignored that huge burden coming within it feels like it's starting to consume me again.  I know that sometimes we cannot avoid not having money because as many know it comes with having a lack of a job and even though I am going to start working in a month again it still will not be enough. It sucks because now I only have a total of $5 period and well since our fridge is broken I will probably use them to buy a half gallon of milk for later. Well lucky for me I at least have a $25 weekly allowance from teaching a lesson but sadly it's not enough. I do wish to pursue so a job but I guess that means re-applying to many of those jobs that I already applied for. Does re-applying define desperateness to have a job. I mean can't people really understand that people sometimes really needs a job and will bend backwards just for a chance. I mean without  a doubt I believe that any job I find cannot be harder than having to learn how to do everything for a child having no experience... Now that's jumping the gun... so can an easy task of ringing off people and bagging their items be so complicated only a few are bound to the the necessity skills to obtain just a glamorous job? I think not. It's cashiering, that's it. I hope next year will be a busy one because with the looks of it... and with luck I am going to be working my regular part time at the school and hopefully a full time... And luckily for me that will only fulfill the requirements to be ok paying off my school loans so I can start applying to go to school again... Life sucks man.... Today I couldn't sleep in the morning because I just kept thinking about money. I ask my self, "How can I get money?", "Where can I get money?" , "easy quick scheme?", "hahaha, they don't work!" All I could think about it is money. But the fun part of being a parent is that my kids will never know... and the ironic thing is that my parents still don't understand either. I don't know if I ever wrote about how peaceful I had it the other day with no complaints will I have one today.... MY MOTHER!