Meeting cool Xangans! @Nerdyveggiegirl @Sasgal oh & @GodlessLiberal

In the last few weeks I've had the great pleasure to meet some wonder xangans. I didn't think that in my long time in xanga time I would actually start meeting new people in my life well with the lovely company of my boyfriend @Cucumber_melonhead
For the longest time I was not involved in the community because of my shyness or anti-socialness .... I've always been a little awkward and/or have a hard time with people. But, Slowly being in the internet and interacting with more people I started breaking out of my shell. I do admit, not a lot but enough to be ok with people.
The first Xanga I met was Johnson @Cucumber_melonhead  "I Met a xangan" and soon after we as a couple wemet @RighteousBruin, who was a wonderful person

And as time goes I think we're forming friendships and trust. 
We met @Nerdyveggiegirl on July 1st, 2012 and she is amazing. Very lovely, lively, and an awesome mom amongst other things . I know why krisko loves her so much. She was coming home with her daughter from Vegas and she knew I lived somewhere on the way home so she stopped by my house. We got to chit chat while the her daughter and my son played in the room. I learned kids will event stuff to play with with what they got... oh creative minds... and the fun part was while we talked Johnson made us a delicious dinner. More company made it that much better.

Myself, and *M*

The ladies with the awesome Chef!! =D 

My son and *M*'s daughter 

Johnson with 2 very beautiful ladies! 

So, We met @SasGal on July 11, 2012 ... She was traveling down and she was going to be in LA. She wanted to meet and we had a tight schedule because we were leaving to Minnesota on the 12th but we made it work. Unfortunately she came from LA all the way to my house in Apple Valley and I felt so bad because I'm sure it was like a 2 hour drive. My car started acting up that day and over heated and left me stranded for a bit close to home.
She came over and we got to talk and she played with out kitten and it was fun times. The 2nd amazing and fun xangan in the month of July! She stayed a small while but she was heading to San Diego which was quite a drive from where I lived to I understood when she needed to go. It was a true joy to finally meet her and I hope one day Johnson and I can go up to Washington to say hello to her and see the beautiful green up there.

My kitten Milky loved her! 

Myself, Sarah, and Johnson =D 

I didn't get the memo to be goofy... lol

On July 16, 2012 the last day before our adventure was ending in Minnesota Johnson had promised Danny has we would return to Mall of America to go on a few rides on Nickelodeon Universe and we thought it would be the prefect place to Meet Krisko @GodlessLiberal...  Finally got to meet him the 3rd xangan of the month of July!  He was one of the friends I met here on xanga that I have had kept more in touch with even though sadly it wasn't much but it was still more than most. When we started talking we became pretty good friends, I had never had someone help me out so much with the mind of gentlemen as he did. He became a good friend and like a brother type. Not many people have that ability. We hung out for a bit and went on a few rides, talked some while johnson and my son went on a couple of rides and then on a mission for a shirt for my bro. Fun times, indeed. Wish we didn't live so darn far but I enjoyed the time we all had. It was about time.

We see krisko for the first time...whoa! =D

Krisko, and Us! yeah buddy... lol 

The Boy trying to be cool... yea try a lil harder... I mean 

look at these cool guys! ;P

We decided to go on the log chute. My son dictated who was assign with who. 

The perfect pic of the 4 of us, the boys in line! 

=D 

My son and I ... woo hoo!!! 

Krisko and Johnson Weeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

Getting off was the sad part... Ahh man! =( 

That was part of our day. We also got on another ride, a roller coaster. It was fun! We all screamed... haha as it should happen.

So these are some of our times meeting more of you wonderful xangans... I hope we slowly get to meet more of you! *muah* kiss to you all... well in the cheek because I reserve my lips to my one and only! =D

a-ok

All in all what is there to complain about? Life is good... life is great actually. Sometimes in the mists of all the happiness there is still something within making you feel a little sad. I do not what it is. It has nothing to do with people. My son and I are way better than ever. We're able to communicate a lot more than we ever were. He is starting to understand and listen.
Everybody is taken. My bro O that kept just dating, sexing, or talking to girls finally found a girl who he for the first time in his life brings around.
So for about 9 days my bro R was home after bootcamp and there were 3 couple.... the only ones missing were my sis and her bf. It was nice but very tiring. So many people in the house and I'm still getting use my sister-in-law and nephew living with us. I've never been much of a people person. Sometimes being around people overwhelms me way too much. I haven't felt like I live my in my house unless I'm in my room and of of late I'm spending less and less time in my room so you can imagine, I feel sometimes a bit weird in my own home.
Sometimes I wonder if something is wrong with me. I'm happy. I'm excited about life. It's just that in my little  down times that I start thinking a little. And I hate thought of thinking. I know how horrible that sounds. Babe, I'm ok, so don't worry.
Oh yea, we got this little kitten. He's white and we're calling him "Milky" he's about 4 weeks and he's so cute and adorable! He wakes me up very early because he's hungry and then goes right back to sleep after eating.
I've been wanting to sleep more and more... lately. Sometimes it feels as if I don't sleep enough and I'm starting to sleep later in the day and it makes me sad I wake up to tired in the mornings. Like I even want to take a nap and start falling asleep and then I feel very very guilty, like I shouldn't or it's not right. I sometimes don't want to do anything. I know I shouldn't be like that. I should be motivated, up and runnin' (perhaps literally) but *sigh* it aint true... the more and more I think ... I think we're going to start taking walks because I'm hating it. Yes, it. I'm seeing myself and the less and less I'm happy with me. Everything else is perfect. But, I see myself and it's not worthy of all  this happiness I have.
oh so excited about going to MN in 2 weeks. My cousin is getting married, it's about time I'd say but it's not like she's that older than I am, only a year and a half. I guess we all take time to find a person. I suppose marriage should be something that you thoroughly think about.

Boot wedding...

My little bro joined the USMC and it's nice. We're all proud of him, he wants to do something with mechanic in aviation. He always wanted to fix something. I guess they would give him more opportunity than any there are out there. He just went back to San Diego today after his 9 day leave after boot camp. It was a nice graduation.

My son looked up to him so much, he said he wanted to become a Marine as well. I guess we'll see what the future really holds. I am not one to stop him from seeing the benefits of life. I mean his biological father went into the Marines as well a few years back and his grandfather was also in the Marines. Life is life and where the winds takes him I will support him wholeheartedly. 

We went to family day on the 14th of June of 3 months. It was nice to him but so hard to recognize him.  The place was very beautiful and peaceful,  relaxing and a bit overwhelming all at once. Not overwhelming because it truly was but because the exhaustion you felt from their energy and yet the relief to finally be able to see familiar faces.

Then there was his actual graduation day which was the next day, June 15th, which happened to be his 20th birthday! =D
 

Their marching ceremony. 

He was happy to see his gf

My parents and my son super uber happy!! 

 

My sis took time off work and here she is giving out lil bro a huge hug! =D

My lil bros turned 20 this day 06-15-12 <3

That saturday we had a welcome home get together with friends and family. I guess they say I got a little too happy (tipsy) that was fun...  I say I'm a happy person already.

Monday we were going to get ready to clean after a couple days of having people over and well my bro R surprises us that he and his gf are getting married. We get ready fast and follow them to the hall of records ... they get hitched...

Man and wife on 06-18-12

Last monday the 25th this lady from the prayer group we go to on fridays came and did a nice prayer for his leaving today. It made me tear up specially when my dad made a prayer and his voiced cracked a bit. Never in my life had I heard my dad's voice crack and shed a tear. But it was truly endearing. Right now my bro is back in San Diego, his wife took him, and he has more training and in a couple of months he's going to be heading out to Florida which is where he'll get his MOS training. I guess his field is a 5 year contract.
Oh and we also found out thursday that he's having another boy. I'm sure my dad was very happy to hear that. But, my dad wasn't happy about how they eloped. oh well.

Many things happening.

Is music ever worth it?

There's always a lot to say and never enough time. It seems as though this upcoming school year will bring me more students more than ever before and I'm grateful but it's still not enough to cut it. I know it's hard when every job you've applied to in the High Desert isn't hiring and those who are, don't. Agencies suck, Job fair seemed promising and it wasn't. Well who knows... I guess some things just take time. It's about patience. But, who really has patience when sometimes even minimum seems glorious but then again I can try and spend more money I don't have and get more opportunities in different fields as well.
I wanted to stay closer to home to avoid using all that gas. My car is already showing wearing from the driving I already do. There's not much up here. I suppose I can look down the mountain but the question remains: Where would I stay? Would I commute? How much would I end up in the month if I drove to and from an hour plus each way? So many questions...
@Cucumber_melonhead and I have briefly talked about it and setting goals but it hasn't been defined. I've been hooked up in the past with applications where there are openings (for the long commute) and unfortunately even those fall through. I am so much more optimistic than I was before but I suppose it's also the lack of inspiration. It's not there and I don't know how to get it like I once had illusions in high school. It seems as when you grow up you lose that spark and getting it back isn't the same. I guess what I've been waiting for is that spark but I also know that if I don't try I will never get it. I still feel helpless at times...or hopeless. I know there is so much that can be done but I don't know where to start. Everything will always cost money and the issue is getting something better. Maybe if I can adjust my teaching business and let that boom but our field is full of failure. Not failure at teaching and reaching out but because we're always put last when it comes to different subjects and/or sports. Music isn't encouraged much. I know first hand... sort of... My dad was supportive and encouraged it and my mother hated it and thought it was a waste of time... Can you imagine when I told my mom  I was going to major in Music... Yea, she threw a fit. I didn't hear the end of it... For the longest time she felt more pride in saying that I dropped out of my Psychology major when I had my son that saying that I got a music degree. Music for the most part never puts food on the table and that's why it's so hard to keep a passion that you know you'll continue that vicious cycle everyone sees. So much talent but people will always go for the route that gives you the money. It's the honest truth. I've stuck it through, with tears... I love it and hate it. I love teaching and love seeing students grown and I love what happens in the long run. I hate the almost no pay... and I really mean, it mainly pays for gas. Why do it then? I didn't major in music because it would give a huge payout but because I loved it. I didn't fight constantly with my mom because i was stubborn. Music is misunderstood. Music is love. Music is passion. Music is not for all. Music will starve you but will feed your soul. It won't feed your children though.
As you can see it's my dilemma. Honestly, I don't think I ever want to give up giving a little back in the music field. I just enjoy it to much. Giving it up would probably kill me a little inside. It's what I have always loved. I've been made fun of, and  still am many times. What can I say I enjoy it a little more than some and it's easier to make some feel like it's a negative than a positive. God know why I got this small gift. I use it to share and give in return to multiply and show there is so much more out there in music. I know I don't touch many lives but those who have gotten a little something out it make me happy. I know I sometimes do tend to talk a bit much about music but I hold it in more now because sometimes I feel I don't have people to talk about it with. I can't even mention a song or much of the structure because it sound like gibberish to so many.
Well here's to life and I guess what can you do but continue forward and just expect for the best. I've learned there is no reason to feel all down and depressed over nothingness... It's not going to change anything. "There's no reason to cry over spilled milk" It's a part of life how you learn to deal with it. I hope I can get a supplementary job...
I hope it happens soon.

weekend

Not much time for blogging these times since I'm limited...

I guess, it's hard to write about many things when there is just those happy moment that impact your life so much and make you happy. I just have the best boyfriend in the world and I really am the luckiest girl alive. I don't even see how any guy can compare to him unless you look into those cliche romantic comedies. *sigh* I know what we have isn't perfect for everyone but it's just perfect for us.

And to think that if it wasn't for the internet or xanga we never would have met. We live far to far away and our paths don't cross otherwise. It was fate to meet him and she dealt a freakin check hand. I feel on the of the world in happiness. I'm happy I can tell him everything and he understands and there is no shame. We just have great communication. Sure, I have my moments but he's perfect with each other. He makes me feel like the prettiest girl and I guess as long as I am to him that's all that matter. I spend saturday and sunday with him sort of. Saturday he took me to a place to get an oil change on my car...very very good deal, $16... and then he performed which he wore a tux... very sexy. Then we had nothing to do so went back to his house and just had us time and relaxed and then ate. The next morning we went to a motivational speaker(sadly for him it was in spanish, but I took notes in english and left them for him to read, lol) with my parents... I liked it, felt bad for him though but we ate there. Then we went back to his house changed out of our business attire and watched "The Vow" together... awww... very sweet story. And then we went to eat Dinner with his dad, and brothers... they wanted me to try actual chinese food not the panda express kind or fast food kind... it was so good... and so fulfilling... yum!! I can eat that and be happy! Still need to get use to some of the tastes but it's delicious!
I had to go pick up my son because he was with his siblings at @snoog420 Ani but unfortunately on my way there I got a flat... but the most wonderful man @cucumber_melonhead with to my rescue and made things better. He let me borrow Ester and his has Marshmallow .... I got home at 3ish I think or fell asleep 3sh but overall it was a great weekend. =D Next weekend should be very fun as well!! yay!!

My Mother's day weekend

So this past weekend was Mother's Day... And I can honestly that my mom and I kind of celebrated it a little since Thursday May 10th... I don't know if any of you know but Mother's day in Mexico is Celebrated on the 10th and my mom born in Mx and well since I am Mexican also logically we celebrated.
I gave her a glass of Moscatto (that my boyfriend bought for me when we went wine tasting in Temecula, Ca  ) and of course i drank one too...
Friday we went to a prayer group which they spoke of children and how they affect as as parents and what they mean to us... of course how we should try and understand them because we were them at one point as well...
and my son gave me flowers as well... such a sweet little man...



On saturday I wanted to make tacos but it didn't happen but I did have a date with the boyfriend that evening even though he hasn't told me where we were going to meet or if he was going to come up but it was ok.... hehehe Good thing I was half ready when he called me that evening even though I was shopping and Danny wasnt' ready and it was late already...

So, I got home Danny was almost half ready my mom has woken him up and told him to get ready. We left at like 7 from AV and for to Edwards at 8ish... little did we know he was going to make us wait purposely...  My son was super impatient. He thought JC was inside waiting for us and I would call him and no answer. I called him a few time in 30 mins and a couple text and this was wasn't responding. Very unlike him. Now with Danny running around and "Mom... mom... mom" I was a time bomb ... I was a little upset.... It was a weird day and I had done so much cleaning I was a bit tired by then and wanted to relax and there was no where to sit and I didn't want to sit in the floor before getting the tickets.

I was waiting and thought ok we'll see the 8:30 showing .... SOLD OUT!!

ok, We'll see the 8:50 showing .... SOLD OUT!!  And that's when he finally called me and said he was in the wrong theater... And in my mind I was thinking like "WHAT!!"  his plan all along....
He gets there and stand in line 9:05 showing just SOLD OUT!!  We had to wait to the 9:40 of "The Avengers" It was a good movie. I enjoyed it.
We go in and he  gives me candy ... 5 of them...

He buys my son some food and we go in ...
After that he came clean on why he was late... lol He asked to remember the first time we met ... Which was also in Ontario. And I did he gave me 5 sugar Daddys ... and he asked me to remember after ... After the night was over and we were going to go our separate ways he gave me jewelry he won was Lisa @LKJslain and her contests...
He went to his car and came back ...
he had

So I asked him what it was ... he said I had to open it ... Facepalm ... DUH!!!
So I did ...


This cute little box... 
And I opened it...

Isn't this beautiful!!! I'm almost scared to wear it that I might lose it.


This my self, JC and my son ... we all loved the movie.


Don't we look so adorable!!! <3 =D  @cucumber_melonhead and I

So Sunday when I woke up my dad gave a rose

and my fam and I went to mass and then home and I made tacos... they were delicious but tiring...

As we were finishing up I asked my dad for a beer
 
And that just hit the spot. I had the best weekend ever and loved every second of it. There were tiring moments and everything but that's the way it should be.

It's been a while

Wow, I truly can't believe I've been gone and out for more than two months. Well, I needed to because I was $80 for internet and it was a huge struggle with my small income.

there were so many times I wished I was able to come on and write my little heart out like I always did but since I can't get much of xanga on my BB  it sucked and limited to phone internet sucks...

So many things have happen and yet nothing has changed. I am still as happy as could be. JC and I have been together for 5 months and you know we still have something to talk about. First person that it seems like I never stop talking.
Let it be known, I love talking when there is something that interests me. lol And I hope he doesn't gett bored of me talking.

On the day of our 5 months but who is actually counting. Lol! We went to one of his friend's wedding. Very beautiful reception. 

I think we've progressively have gotten to know each other fairly well and even with my horrible memory we're or I'm very happy. I've met quite a few of his friends and he's met probably the majority of my family and will meet more  when we go to Minnesota in July.
My son loves him a lot and respects him. He always looks forward to him coming over and we all get to enjoy time together. Whether it's going to the park, movies, chuck e cheese or just hanging out at home it's all a wonderful time. My family loves him a lot and I'll tell you a little secret.

Shhh.... 



I think he's grown on me too.... I love this man!

Nothing sweeter than a kiss from him!

I never get bored, he understands me, listens to me and talks a lot ... but he doesn't think so. He does say I talk too much and is surprised that I tell him  that I don't. lol Oh well... He says I'm a brat but he's a brat or maybe he's picked up on my ways... But, in all seriousness I've never been this truly happy in my life. All those moments that kept me down in life suddenly seem so pointless. I'm glad #xanga brought him into my life and we've gotten to know each other.
This is how I always pictured I'd find someone for me. Of course, due to my circumstances I didn't picture it this way but nothing in life could be more perfect as it now. He's brought me and my son closer and we've learned to live and understand each other more. We were clashing far too much a while ago but everything is great. We've all formed a bond. *sigh* 

@cucumber_melonhead found me, crushed on me, and had me fall in love with him. What a cruel man... jk I hope every one is fortunate to find the person who truly compliments their life as I feel he does to me.

I love you Johnson!